Dear God,

I am thankful. I hope You can hear me.

I don’t fully understand life or why things happen the way they do. It feels like I’ve learned more in the past few years than I ever expected, and so much of what I’ve learned has broken apart the constraints built by society and this world—the beliefs I’ve inherited through culture, expectation, and even genetics.

I feel You reaching out to me through different avenues: through Scripture, through nature, and through the quiet language of my own spirit. Yet, if I’m honest, I think I’m afraid to fully surrender to the joy and peace You offer. Perhaps I’m afraid of letting go.

I stand on the edge of a transition I never saw coming.

I’m not the most educated, the most beautiful, or the most accomplished person. But one thing I do know is that I think and feel differently. Because of that, I find myself constantly searching beneath the surface, longing to understand life, humanity, and the purpose You created us for.

Whenever I begin to accept the norms of society without question, I lose sight of the deeper calling You’ve placed within my soul. Yet, in Your mercy, You never let me stay there. You remind me that seeking truth is part of who You’ve created me to be, and that sacrificing comfort does not mean abandoning the calling of my soul.

Sometimes the depth of what I feel overwhelms me. It can make me feel like an outsider—a stranger in a world that often seems content with easy answers. But even then, You never abandon me.

Instead, You gently lead me through the treacherous seas of doubt until I finally make landfall on clarity.

I believe the path You’ve designed for me is different from the one You’ve designed for many others. Not because it is greater, but because it is uniquely mine. And I know that not everyone will understand it. Some may never see what You are doing. But You do.

I don’t know if I always have the strength for this journey. There are days when my mind grows weary and my heart questions everything. Yet until my final breath, I will keep walking toward You.

Because when I look back over my life, one truth remains undeniable:

You have never given up on me.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
— Jeremiah 29:11